Before you even ask, yes I’ve fallen down on my job. We returned from our extended vacation late last Monday night at which point I should have begun religiously using the timed to do lists I have printed out. But I didn’t. And I have no solid reason for why I didn’t. I can offer up excuses, but what it boils down to is this – I drastically overestimate how much I can do in one day. I start almost every day assuming I’m going to get way more done than I do and I know the list will help me overcome this. However I’m afraid of instituting the list because:
- I fear the discrepancies in my estimates of how long tasks should take versus how long they actually do. What if I can only cross off 3 things every night? And even more worrisome – WHY do I care?
- I don’t want to feel confined by a list. I realize the whole point of my 12 months of giving things up is to institute some self discipline, so this is an internal conflict. I feel like I’m playing both the role of child and parent.
I could go on, but all other concerns stem from these two. I’m fed up with my own excuses though, and have instituted the list (thus this blog post was born). I’m also planning on trying out a couple of these tactics, as much as I am not looking forward to it, in order to help me prioritize the lists. I quickly realized that this was going to take longer than one month to properly give up, so I will continue to report on my progress until I feel I’ve sincerely put forth a genuine effort to give it up. Hopefully by then I will have made some long lasting adjustments to the way I structure my days.
And yes, in case anyone was wondering, I do see the irony in the fact that giving up procrastination is taking longer than I expected. On the bright side by choosing such a juggernaut goal in January, I have learned my lesson and stand a pretty fair chance of succeeding in next month’s goal. TBA soon…